Hey guys, so as usual, a late post for the weekend. It was a good relaxing weekend. I really do not want to go to work tomorrow but I suppose I need to pay bills…not rich yet. If I were rich though, I wonder where I would end up. Would I stay in this shitty town going downhill fast or would I end up on the north eastern coast somewhere? If I was rich enough I could regularly hop onto a private jet and come back whenever I missed my daughter and her parents I suppose maybe. Although maybe I wouldn’t need to much, I am not her mom, she does not need me like she would need a real mom. I will never be able to afford something safe around here, not unless it leaves me with no way to get ahead financially. I suppose that is a way that having a significant other is handy, two incomes. Reality is that I am stuck living in this neighborhood that has a good chance of becoming even worst the next few years or waste so much money on an apartment in a decent area that drains me and leaves me with no way to get ahead. I know I have talked about this before but when I was looking at apartments, decent ones that were in safe places and on the cheaper end had non refundable pet deposits up 500-1000$ per pet. I will not get rid of mine. And that is looking at apartments that will consider me because there are income guidelines that they will not rent more than 1/3 of a persons income, which can put me about a couple hundred more than what I pay, but than that can make it tight with my loan I pay that I took out to consolidate all my bad debt. So I can take the chance and wait to pay off that loan in the next 2.5 years and hope this area doesn’t get too much worst than it is, and if it does, I suppose just deal. I have been in worst areas. I need to stay around here for school. It’s funny though, because with all the times I have actually lived in bad areas, this is the first place I have felt that sense of danger. I will be lucky if I ever became even lower middle class. If I can’t have wealth, I would at least like to be poor somewhere safe.

Hmm…It was a relaxing day, but something feels off. I really do not want to go to work tomorrow. Oh well, I am used to dealing I suppose. What is one more day of going to that place? It is literally the best around here for no degree, I suppose in that sense I should be happy. There is still that feeling like I am missing something though.